Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
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She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
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They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
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