did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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