just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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