so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
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You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
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