Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
