just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
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My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
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All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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