I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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