pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
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