so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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