I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
