That's intense
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
