She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation