how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize
