erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
