he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
