he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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