I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
