Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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