Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
