Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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