You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Randomize
