I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off