Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
