Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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