I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
