just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
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I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
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Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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