Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
