There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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