This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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