I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
