He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
...so i touched it.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
