Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
