I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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