I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
