Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I skipped work to stalk him.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Randomize
