addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
