u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize