we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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