Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
i believe in u and ur pee
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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