Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
At least make sure they are 18
Why
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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