super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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