found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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