she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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