I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
3pm strippers are depressing
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize