I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
