discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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