i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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