I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
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