it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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