I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
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